It's All About Balance
Someone once told me that, ‘it’s hard to stay balanced when you’re a mom’.
I didn’t investigate further and she offered no further clarification so, I thought a statement about fitness, balancing work and family life, or perhaps keeping the house clean.
Although these things take effort and require constant attention, she wasn’t talking about the physicality of the job, tasks of daily life, or staying in shape.
She was talking about a deep, innate, emotional balance.
One that you only find by becoming a parent.
It’s the balance of wanting him to go to sleep only to desperately wish he’d wake up so I can smother him with kisses.
The balance between wanting him to like vegetables but desperately wanting to watch his face as he eats something completely delectable for the very first time.
The balance of wanting him to be tough but secretly loving when he needs me or holds on so tight that I feel like a superhero.
The balance between needing my space and missing him the second I walk out the door.
The balance of my wants and his needs. The balance of his wants and my needs.
Most importantly though, I’ve learned that it’s a balance of expectations of myself and the life I once had.
It’s the balance of holding onto the pieces of myself I love while figuring out what type of mom I want to be. The balance of becoming a mom and remaining a friend, partner, and someone else’s child.
The balance of holding on and at the same time, letting go… at just the right time.
Motherhood is ALL ABOUT balance-- it’s just a different type of balance.
And I struggle with that balance. Just as I struggle with keeping the house clean. Just as I struggle with fitting in exercise.
I struggle. And likely, you struggle too.
Because mama, the struggle is real.
This is hard work- physically, mentally and most importantly, emotionally.
I was prepared for the rest. I knew I could handle the rest. But, the fears, the worries, the thoughts; sometimes they are too much to keep in. Sometimes, they are too much to be alone with. And while my husband and I share everything, there is nothing like commiserating with another mama.
There is NOTHING like hearing "I've had that exact thought."
Nothing like knowing someone else is walking the same tight rope- figuring out how to balance it all, too.
This. This is why we need support. This is why we need a tribe; a group of women who can weigh in on our fears, pick us up when we're down, kick us into gear when we're needing a boost and support us through the ups and downs of motherhood and all it brings.
This is also why we need to allow ourselves the time to learn how to work that balance. Just like figuring out any type of balance, it takes time, it takes practice, it takes work.
My new tool, the Mindful Mama E-Course is slated to launch in two weeks and was created to help learn this balance. Together, as a group, we'll work through a week of mindfulness practices and yoga, to center and create balance in our lives. I poured my heart and soul into this course. It was everything I needed after becoming a mom- a little focus, a little mindset shift, and a little yoga.