How to be a Happier Mom, in Three Easy Steps
If you've been paying attention to my posts as of late you'll notice that they have been less about fitness and more about motherhood… and fairly introspective at that.
Obviously, this 2nd pregnancy and the idea of becoming a mama to two has my head in other places other than just working out and eating well. I’m actually trying to figure out how to be a more patient, happier version of myself.
After talking with friends and family and ruminating over how I can make this transition easier and how, I can achieve the aforementioned goals of (let’s face it) being the best mom to my two little fellas, I’ve come up with three (yep, just three) easy steps of being a happier mom.
And, dare I say it: the best mom ever (for your little people).
1. STOP thinking you’re a bad mom, that you don’t do things right, or that you suck at this thing called motherhood. I know it’s a hard habit to break and I say it just as much for myself as I do for you. We all have moments where we’re less than stellar parents, our judgment is a bit lacking, our temper or patience is a bit short or, we’re just tired of this whole gig. But, that doesn’t make you bad at parenting. It makes you completely and authentically human. Mom-ing/ parenting is hard work and I’d be way more suspicious of you, if you thought you were just killing it every single day. So, check yo’self the next time you’re having a “bad mom” moment. Remember that the goal (in my opinion) is to raise kind, grateful humans and as long as you’re moving in that (overall) direction, you’re doing pretty well.
2. Know your limitations; as a person, a woman, and a parent. You can’t be the greatest version of yourself unless you know the circumstances under which you thrive and what, exactly you are able and willing to put up with.
For example, the other day, I was reading a friend’s blog and she mentioned that she put off all the chores to prioritize work. Comparison got the best of me and I started thinking I wasn’t working hard enough. You see, I am a total effing neat freak. I can’t function in chaos, dirty, disorganized mess. I wish I could but, I look around my house after a day of destruction and I want to blow my lid. I feel better, work more efficiently, and am just a happier being when my space is tidy, floors are vacuumed and dishes are done, man. Eventually I stopped comparing, stepped back, and realized that my house being tidy was a limitation for me because let's face it: if mama ain't happy, nobody's happy.Thus, we spend a couple hours each weekend cleaning. Come Monday, we're all in a better place.
3. Move your body. I don’t care how you do this, or under what circumstances. I don’t care how long it lasts, what time you do it or where it takes place… just move. Walk, practice yoga, lift heavy shit, run, roller blade, have a spontaneous dance party in your living room… heck, do it in your chones for all I care. Just move your freaking body. We have been having a ton of sleep issues lately. Meaning, we aren’t sleeping, which also means, I can be less than pleasant in the mornings. But, usually one of the first three things I do in the morning is practice yoga or go for a walk. Most of the time it’s 30 minutes at most. And, most of the time within the first 5 minutes I’m feeling a hell of a lot better.
Realizing that you're exactly where you need to be, knowing what you need to be doing, and understanding how you need to be spending your time will add years to your happiness quotient. And, while I know there's probably a ton more we can do to make parenting "easier" or to make you feel like a "better" mom but these two simple little mind shifts and, a friendly reminder to exercise are a great jumping off place.
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